Final Thoughts

Although the malaria pills are done, I just can’t seem to get Africa out of my system.  I imagine that it will be a long time before my sentences will all stop starting with “In Africa….” Being there really made me think (beyond Lumosity) and touched my heart in so many ways, I am sure my friends and family will be sick of the stories before long and our team will have to adopt some kind of secret handshake to acknowledge that we’re thinking about it….oh, wait – we do have a secret handshake already – Africans go beyond the simple shake of a hand.

Some final thoughts

While we traveled as a “mission team” we were not there to convert people or preach.  The organization that runs the orphanages (Childreneverywhere.org) that provides 24 hour nursing care to pre-mature and high risk infants, a crisis nursery, and provides free primary education to over 2,500 children from grades 1-7 and 365 children in grades 8-12, is not political, dogmatic, denominational or partisan.  They are, however, dependent on the support of churches and individuals from the US.  Their faith is unapologetically strong and a part of their everyday lives-if anything, they ministered to us rather than the other way around.  Their faith goes well beyond the wall of their churches.  No bulletins, BYOBibles, no Hymnals, no organ, reused collection envelopes dropped into buckets, they truly believe that God will take care of them, and it seems to be working.

An embarrassment of riches

Comparatively speaking, the schools and churches that I have visited and worked in the US have an embarrassment of riches.  In the schools we visited in Zambia,  children are eager to go to school and participate – after all many times school is where they will be served their only meal and be fed new information – Zambian TV!  It is easy to say, in comparison, that American kids are spoiled, bored, impatient, and unappreciative (and some may say that is true of all Americans), but you can’t compare apples to oranges.  Being immersed in a different culture is eye opening and fascinating…not everyone gets to (or wants to) have that experience.  Africans (right there I am generalizing because I only visited ONE country in Africa-we tend to think that the countries on the continent of Africa behave like the states in the US -which truly also do have their own culture, but I digress), have one foot in the 21^st Century and one foot steeped in great cultural traditions.  The women administrators where we lived all wore very nice “American-style” business attire and carried a chitenge (the traditional cloth skirts).  The people who came to pick up food at the milk and medicine stops had cell phones!  

(Hold on a minute folks, don’t be quick to judge about money and priorities, etc.  These people, without the infrastructure to have lines for electricity and land lines, for the first time, thanks to wireless communication, have the opportunity to communicate with each other that does not require a multiple mile hike or bike ride – they have families, needs, etc. just like us.  All cell phones are prepaid and many have to go to charging stations to keep them going – do you really think they should stick to drums?)

SIDEBAR:  We were very curious as to why those that were dressed American-style, many times had a chitenge over their clothes.  We asked some of them and they really did not understand what we were asking.  It turns out that there were so many reasons for having one, they could not understand how we could go without.  They wore them for modesty over their street clothes, as an apron over their work clothes, they served as a backpack when they carried their babies or packed up their groceries in them (and put them on their heads).  The social worker said one reason she had one was you never know when someone is going to give birth.  We each got one as a gift from the local church, and our young teen girl learned how to carry a baby (although we worried when she came through doorways with their little heads peaking around).  When we got home, my sister and I were going to talk about the trip with our church and brought ours.  We discovered a new use, when a bat appeared in the vestibule – it served as a nice blocker to keep it from getting into the church. 

Our way

We have to be very careful not to “judge” other people by our own standards and culture.  You have to be careful to not think of your way of doing things as superior. One of the first things we were told in our House of Moses orientation was to “Please do not try to make suggestions about how to change the workers activities” – you can imagine that we could have easily said “we do it this way…..” all day long.  Who are we to tell them how to take care of their business?  What if they changed these kids every minute of the day?

Babies come first

One thing we could not argue with was that “At the House of Moses the babies come first.  What that means is the house may be noisy at night, visitors come and go, the water pressure may be bad and hot water may run out, or there may at times be no water at all.  Please remember that we cannot control power failures and other matters that call for patience.”  We would not have wanted it any other way. (BTW – we did have a generator there, so when the power went out, and you were thrown into complete darkness and I mean complete darkness, with a bottle in one hand and a wailing baby in another, also dark, with no way to figure out where to stick that bottle, it only lasted a few minutes before the lights came back on.)

We were so privileged to be able to get a glimpse into the everyday lives of so many people, from the staff at the House of Moses, into the communities and schools we visited, in their churches, stores, malls, markets, streets, villages, parks, etc.  We tried to be respectful to the people, their families, lives and culture and at the same time record what we saw to share with people back home.  At the same time, they were curious about our lives and sought out information on things like the best computer programs for the high school, even medical issues. 

I have gone through my 700 pictures every night, (and Janet’s 700) in search of the perfect picture that “says it all” – I have a few, but as I look at the pictures, there are a lot of things that remain unsaid, too. 

If you know me, you know that little is left unsaid

“Do not use tap water other than for bathing.  Watch that you do not open your mouth in the shower.  Use bottled water to clean your toothbrush…do not rinse under the tap.” I threw out my toothbrush after the first night.  What most people don’t know is that travelers to the US are given the same instructions, it is not that the water is dirty, it is that it has different “stuff” in it.

Little goes to waste in Africa and yet there are piles of garbage (and sometimes kids picking through it) throughout the compounds.  There is no garbage pickup in the villages and compounds.  If they threw out the amount of garbage that we do in a week, they would have been buried long ago.  Most of the waste is plastic bottles. 

They understand that education is the key to moving their country forward.  Public education is “free” but requires that you buy uniforms and supplies that puts it out of reach of many.  If everyone could go to school, they would not have room for them all anyway.  As it is, they do split sessions. All property, private and businesses are surrounded by walls and metal doors, most of those walls have ads on them.  Lots of them have “public service announcements” about health issues, AIDs, breast-feeding, child abuse, etc.  They are not hiding their heads in the sand.  These issues were also being covered in the classroom.  Teachers always had objectives on the board and a board filled with information or questions.  The information that I saw covered very real and relevant health issues, agricultural issues, political issues (like corruption).  The teachers are teaching.  No watered down curriculum.  Almost all kids are ESL – English is the official language, but they are taught their tribes language first.  No excuses.  There is no one saying, I can’t teach this because I don’t have a … (fill in the blank).

The population here is young, we did not see a lot of older people.  Because we were dealing a lot with families with children, we saw mostly women.  Thanks to education, women are starting to see many new opportunities to help themselves, their families and their communities.  I think they will be key in moving the country forward.  That is not to say that the men are not hardworking.  In the city, there is a lot of hustling, a lot of competition.  You could buy a poster map, a plunger, cell phone time, chips or a banana right through your car window in traffic.  Artists and farmers hawked their wares along the road side in the city and through the villages. There is no doubt that people were working hard to make a living.  In most places, we saw “a woman’s work is never done” as endless cooking and washing chores, combined with walking to get the water and food, took up their entire day.

Transportation and the transport of goods amazed us everywhere we went.  Chickens on bikes, sofas in wheelbarrows (we have delivery trucks, they hire someone with a wheelbarrow), truck beds full of people, crammed vans, stuff on their heads.  All of these modes of transportation share the same roads, most not paved. 

Kids are Kids 

 

Before we left, we tried the lessons that we were going to do in Africa with kids here.  What we learned was not how different the kids were, but how much they had in common.  As Linda would say “kids are kids” – from the kids in the most barren of schools, to the kids in Shangri La (MOMS), to the two kids that traveled with us.  All of the kids liked to laugh (particularly at us!), they liked to interact with each other, they liked distractions from their regular class, they liked video games and electronics, they were curious about each other (We made trading cards I the US to take and in Africa to bring home – they loved looking at them -particularly boy/girl), and they had big hopes and dreams.

Just one more thing…let me assure you that the clothes and shoes that you “cast off” and donate to the Salvation Army, etc. are making it all the way to Africa.  Most of the people that we saw were wearing American T-shirts – sports, pop culture, PE shirts, you name it….they are wearing them!  For some, those cast-offs are a way that they can begin to support themselves and their families.  I can only speak for Childreneverywhere.com, when I say that I know your money is going directly into the care and feeding of the children in those pictures!  I am going to try and get some schools involved in sharing with the schools that I visited, even if it is only a sharing of ideas, it is all good.  Keep giving!  

Zambia is a peaceful nation with a lot of hope and potential in their children.  Most of our time was spent in the capital city of Lusaka which just gives one side of the story.  There are plenty of people living their lives in far out villages, those kids go to school (often far walks and share the same hopes and dreams of their country.

The animals also seem to have one foot in the 21st Century and the other foot in another, as they go about their business (sometimes literally) as we drive by in our souped-up jeeps.  Watching them as they swim, play, run and eat is just an indescribable privilege.

There are a lot of words that will elicit a smile and a story from us:  let ‘er buck, head’s up, George, Louis, Catherine, Bob, Peek-a-boo hippo, pretzels, caterpillars, sprinkler, Yeaaas, no, no, no, no, chickens, the bridge, googly eyes, Simon Says, French toast and tacos, kwacha, speed bumps, malaria pills, happy plates, WD40, the Charleston, purple balls, peanut butter, pompoms, scrum and TIA!  There’s more but that’s another whole blog all together!

Parting is such Sweet Sorrow

Well, it is time to wrap up our visit.  The last 18 days have sure given us all a lot to reflect on.  We are all scrambling to keep up our journals, share our pictures, and get one last shot in with the babies.  Most of us have left on a set of "quick dry" clothes and have left out a pair of clothes to wear on the plane.  Can't really sit next to someone smelling like baby poop for 16 hours!  I am carrying home a little bit of George as a result of a direct hit with a sneeze on our visit to the BBB.

We are warned by Kevin that our suitcases will be going through a special screener to ensure that we have not taken any of the babies when we leave.  I am pretty sure that Janet is plotting how she can get one home, we shall see.

It is tough to say good bye to the kitchen staff.  We have had to walk through the kitchen every time we go to our room- most of the time I say something clever (they probably have no idea what the heck I am talking about) and that causes me to forget what I was going to the room for.  Then I would go back so I could remember and go back through the kitchen keeping my mind focused on my goal and realize I forgot a key (Linda and I were sharing)....needless to say, I walked through the kitchen ALOT!

Sometimes the girls would be singing (and we did make them sing with us - we made everyone sing with Takwava with us), sometimes they would be feeding a crowd, sometimes all alone.  There was a never ending line of mouths to feed (including ours).  They were such nice people - we had lots of questions for them, they even had some questions for us.  Sweet, sweet people.

We arrived at the airport with plenty of time to spare and some Kwachas that need to be spent and shop one more time for souvenirs.

Once we arrive in "Joburg" airport, which is like an upscale mall - Janet hunts down some contraband eggs with toys in them - apparently we have outlawed them in the US because of choking hazards for young children....it is only fitting that she brings them home after all the potential choking hazards incidents we have left behind.                                                                                      

Just 20 more hours and we will be home!

Tomorrow will be my last post - of Parting Shots and Lasting Impressions.....

Just one more sleep....

It is hard to believe that this trip is coming to an end.  We are at 17 days and counting, just one more night.  Carol, Ron and the grandkids have been packed since yesterday.  The 5 moms (so named because we have all given poor Sarah motherly advice on more than one occasion- We have given it to Ryan, too, but he seems unaffected - Sarah, on the other hand has taken to numbering us according to her favorites, let me correct that, her favorite...for some reason, unbeknownst to all of us Janet has risen to the top of the list- Mom #2 - Sarah's real mom was #1) are resisting packing until the last day.  Our dorm room looks like we have made ourselves quite at home.

We have taken to having a "spot of tea" in the afternoon and sitting outside in the fresh air.  A great way to detox and debrief at the end of the day.  Jannean not only fetches the tea, but she also serves it on a tray with a curtsy.  

The House of Moses is one of the rare places that has the luxury of grass, which they keep watered with their custom-made sprinkler system - a plastic water bottle with holes, held on with electrical tape (duct tape is hard to come by here).  One day we played the game "Head's Up" on Linda's iPad - it involves charades and other activities that might seem strange to people unaccustomed to grown women acting our animals or shouting out hints, etc.  We are sure that the kitchen staff was very entertained (or terrified!).  Turns out that the app actually makes a video of your antics - which then entertained us!  Ridiculous fun in the sun!

 Tonight, the Reverend and his family are coming to dinner!  The kitchen staff is taking care of the food, but we are on our own for the rest.  No fears though, Janet and Jannean or like Martha Stewart, Emily Post, and (insert the name of the kindest person you know here) all rolled into one.  We had a great dinner of steak, potatoes, and gravy cooked African style followed by an All-American dessert:  3 cakes, "Napolean" ice cream, vanilla ice cream, coke, coke light, orange soda and Caribbean Onion and Balsamic Vinegar Potato Chips!  What a feast!

There was no problem with dinner conversation either as Reverend M'Tonga was quite a captivating conversationalist....all was going well until  he asked "So, how is Obama doing?"  There was an awkward moment before I explained that it was best not to discuss politics at the dinner table as we Americans tend to have strong feelings in all directions and no problem expressing them.

The Reverend brought his two sons, not twins, a member of Presbytery and his sister-in-law and her daughter (I may be wrong on the relationship of the woman and her child - I spent half the night thinking that she was his wife!)  The kids loved the dessert an loved playing video games on the iPad with Linda.  (A few days ago, Tom brought his kids over and Linda took out her iPad and set up a game-they played once and beat her high score! hahaha).

At the end of the night, the Reverend said that he had a surprise for all of us - a gift from his church.  Each of us received a chitenga - the colorful cloth that is used as a sling, skirt, you name it.  Sarah and Ryan's were from the youth group.  Ours was from the women of the church.  Very cool!  Although I am not quite sure that we come close to knowing how to wear them correctly. Can't wait to sling mine on and head on down to ShopRite.  (Did I tell you that ShopRite is a food chain there, too?)

One Last Visit to Bed, Bath and Beyond

The Bill and Bette Bryant House, the BBB or Bed Bath and Beyond as I call it, is the orphanage for the 3-5 or 6 year old set.  We visited them AND we come bearing gifts!  Jannean and Carol have outdone themselves in shopping for the kids and we can't wait for them to see what we have for them.
  
The kids are just waking up from their nap and start to come out of the rooms, one by one to see us all sitting in the living area.  They are a just a tiny bit (and I mean tiny bit) hesitant to come into the room, but soon have all come in and found a lap to sit on.  I am sitting on the floor and have one child on my lap, another one comes and squeezes on.  We start up a song and they take over!  

The caretakers call the kids over and start putting the new shoes on them.  We are so excited - they look great!  Next each of them gets to try on a new shirt, skirt or outfit.  Now, they are really excited...about the tags. I am pretty sure that they are fascinated with the tags because we want to take them (we seem to be all consumed with choking hazards, etc).  
Some of these kids are like old (young) friends now. We know their personalities and love watching them interact with each other and all of us.  

Wrapping Things Up!

This is our last day out into the Compounds and we are heading for a Catholic Church in the Linda Compound! (Imagine, she has only been here 17 days and already has a Compound named after her!).  We have managed to talk Matilda into driving with us and we are peppering her with questions.  She was born and raised in one of the small villages outside of Livingstone. She tells us that many children in the villages do not start school until they are 7 or 8 because they have such a long way to walk (and usually have to do it on their own).  Each day her mom would pack her some food in a bowl for her lunch, but she had to walk several miles to school and would get tired and eat it before she got there.  At lunchtime she would cry because she was hungry and had nothing.  She decided that she did not want to go to school.  There is no law that says that you have to go to school, but Matilda's parents know it is important and send her to live with her half brother, who lives close to a school.  It is unfathomable how many barriers these children must overcome just to attend school!  Matilda lived in a grass thatched roof hut and said that it was cool, even in the hottest time of the summer!

Now, it's time for Matilda to ask us some questions - she will be moving to the states while Kevin goes to college.  We assure her that with a little one, it will be easy to strike up a conversation with other moms and to make friends.  We laughed together at some of the cultural differences that she has run up against - she doesn't think she would ever be able to wear a bikini in public....we all agreed, we wouldn't be caught dead in one either....of course her reason was cultural modesty, ours was cultural mortification.  Matilda is a modern African woman who is comfortable in both American business clothes, and traditional chitengas.  She wields a cell phone with the best of them.

The Linda Compound is a little bit different than the others that we have visited.  This one is further outside the city and seems to be a little more spread out than the others.  There is a big crowd of women here and we are disappointed that we don't have any balloons for them, but the bubbles are a big hit.  This time we give the bubble bottles to some of the young ladies that are here (many with babies strapped to them) and let them do the blowing.  Keeps us from hyperventilating!  We watched one of the girls slip the bubble bottle into her chitenga with the baby she is carrying - happy that we had something to give her!

Superman and his brother had a great time riding this barrow-less wheel barrow!  A valuable piece of transportation in the compound.

On the way home, Suzanne decided that we should try our hand in buying something from one of the vendors who come to the van windows.  We located one with chips (Caribbean onion and balsamic vinegar- our new favorite) and she opens the window and calls out!  He comes over and she gets out her wallet (this is where Matilda figures out what we're doing and tells her to put her wallet down, get the chips before you get the money, etc.)  She pays K2.5.  Well what good is it to successfully buy something from a street vendor if it has not been immortalized on film....do over.  She gets her money ready and she locates another chip guy (she could also have bought cell phone time, car chargers, oranges, maps of Africa, or a plunger)- Janet has the camera ready.....He tells her it is K3!  She has no more single Kwachas and traffic begins to move, she has the chips, he runs us down, Janet gets involved - somehow we end up with 2 bags, have overpaid him and still don't have a picture.  I think Matilda and Everito (our driver today) think that we are crazy.  

M&M Part 2

Another day of packing Van#1 and Van#2 for another Milk & Medicine run.  This time there was a group waiting for us.  They greeted us with a song of welcome and blessed us for coming all the way from the US to see them. Milk and medicine gives families the support they need to keep their children in the home.  Each child was weighed and measured.  A full report is made on the children who are sponsored by people in the US.  It is amazing that the women are carrying home enough food to allow their families to eat three meals a day with a snack.

                                   

The program empowers women by supporting their efforts to become independent. The women are put into groups according to neighborhood and are asked what they thought they could afford to contribute to the group.  They put their 2 kwacha apiece together and buy something in bulk, like charcoal, and sell them in their neighborhood.  So they have made an investment and share the returns.  This gives them ownership and starts them on their way to begin to support their families.  As with all programs, some take off with it and do become independent, some just cannot do it.  When it works, it keep families together and children where they belong, in a loving home.

      

While the parents received their food supplies, Team Zambia pulled out the backpack 'o fun!  We are getting smarter, though and brought yarn to tie on to the balloons.  Even though they were not helium, the wind took them fast and far - over walls and out of the church yard.  You could spot the bright color of the balloons in and around the compound as we drove away.  

Breaking News!  

We just learned that one of the littlest babies here at the House of Moses is heading to a home full of love.  Sarah has given a lot of special attention to this baby, just 27 days old.  We have quietly watched the process over the last few days, as the mother has visited with our little Alice.  The woman adopted Alice's sister in 2011 from BBB.  With children in and out of the hospital while we have been here, it has been a true joy to see a child leave in the arms of a loving mom.  

      

We sent the mom off with one of the blankets that Janet's mom made.  What a great way to illustrate that it takes a village to raise a child-from the administrators, caretakers, staff and missionaries of the House of Moses to program directors, school teachers and staff in the schools and communities, to the volunteers and churches of the US and the people who supported them with their katumbas, knitting skills, cash and clothing donations, the combined effect is to make a difference in the life of a child.

 (This post by my sister Linda was cross posted on the team blog at http://branchville-zambia2014.blogspot.com/)

Making a Milk and Medicine Run

Today we loaded up Van #1 with nutrient packs (enough for one a day for 30 days), 20 pound bags of Roller Meal (corn meal), bottles of cooking oil, ground nuts (peanuts), and formula (Zambians are encouraged to breast feed, so it is just provided for those that can't).  Van # 2 we loaded up with people and headed out to the Matera Compound.

We pulled into the Church of Christ parking lot where women and children were waiting.  First, we sing! I love that everything here starts with a song - everyone joins in - we are even singing in the vernacular, thre is always someone who starts us and cues us in for each verse and their are great harmonies.   Kevin interviews the families of those children who have been sponsored and Matilda, a social worker (and also Kevin's wife), start the weighing and measuring of every child under 18 months.  

The mothers sat on the grass and wait their turn with their babies as the older siblings run around.  We got the bubbles and balloons going and soon there was screaming and running and the general chaos of kids at play. After chasing down several balloons in the wind, we have decided next time we will bring string!

Once the food was distributed, the moms (or grandmas) all lined up for clothing donations -  They were handed some clothes and got to the back of the line until all of the donations were distributed - there were shirts, curtains, blankets, sheets, even a Christmas decoration (which they could not figure out what they were supposed to do with it - I am sure it will be turned into some kind of jacket by the end of the day).   You could just imagine this bag of stuff coming straight from one of the parking lot bins in Andover.  I have to tell you that we often wonder if our donations make it all the way to Africa - let me tell you they are wearing your cast-offs -shoes, NFL shirts, jeans, Hello Kitty pants, Happy 13th birthday Amanda, etc. -if you have ever donated clothes, they are wearing them and wearing them and wearing them and wearing them!

We are amazed that there are so many multiples of children, two women with triplets and one with twins at this site.  Just one more reason not to drink the water here.  (Which by the way, did I mention that I had to throw out my toothbrush after day one when I rinsed it with water from the sink?!  Thank goodness they gave us toothbrushes on the plane) We wondered how these women would get the 30+ pounds of food and their babies (children have to be younger than 18 months) back to their homes.  Moments later, we watched them wrap up their children in a sling (Chitenga) on their backs and wrap up their food and put it on their heads.  

Since the moms with the triplets had 90 pounds of food to carry, each one of the vans gave one of them a ride.  The woman we drove had recently moved and had a child that was sponsored, so the program director had to see where she lived.  They keep good track of these kids - weight and height, interviews, etc.  We drove through one spot between a bush and a wall that scraped both sides of the van.  Getting stuck in the compound is not an option.  When we arrived at her two room home, her other five children ran out to greet us.  She helped us get out of the maze between the houses, not really roads at all.  I wish you all could get in a van simulator that would toss you around to experience our rides through these neighborhoods.

Once again we eat our packed lunch on the road - pbj, plain pb's and cheese sandwiches.  

When we got back we could not wait to deliver the 3 walkers that we bought for the kids outside.  The kids were thrilled with the toys in the tray and looked as if they were ready for the roller derby!  

Happy 35th Anniversay to my husband Ed - who said he was celebrating with a beer and bruschetta with the dog- I told him I was drinking Parmalat and eating deep fried caterpillars!  (Which were quite crunchy and salty - like any good snack food!)